If you're reading this, you're probably curious so here it goes.
My names Kamela (Kami) Celeste Reyna.
I’m a writer, podcast host, Personal Trainer / Pilates Instructor, some might even say a social media influencer but that's definitely not my favorite title. Aside from all these fun labels, I'm also transparently an anorexia, bulimia and depression warrior.
So you see my fitness journey hasn't always been linear As a child I was always very active - starting dance at age 3 acquiring 15 years of ballet training, playing club volleyball, and joining my high school drill team. Physical activity has always played a super important role in my life.
Despite how busy I stayed with all these activities, I was actually not in great shape. My junior year of high school, I stood 5’4 at 137lbs ("borderline overweight" according to medical guidelines). I ate whatever I wanted (fast food, tons of carbs, and all the chemically processed shit storms I could find). I was completely oblivious to what I was actually putting in my body and how it was affecting me ( sometimes I genuinely miss those days, what it was like before body image came into play I mean). In fact, at one point I was the friend who would get dared to finish a large pizza by myself or to eat a whole tupperware full of mashed potatoes just for pure entertainment. My view on “health and fitness” was as long as I’m an athlete, I can eat anything and I should be just fine.
It wasn’t until my senior year of high school that I started obsessing over my body image. After a two-year relationship came to a devastating end, and prom being just around the corner, I had to look my best because in my mind maybe my ex would want me back then. So I bought a size zero prom dress (yep, size ZERO), and became determined to squeeze my 137lb, size 7 butt into it.
I became a woman obsessed with being the skinniest I could. Through the "help" of Slim-Fast (I say that extremely sarcastically), and restricting my calories, I lost around 8lbs. I slapped on a pair of spanx and unable to breathe or sit for more than 5 seconds I wore that beautiful, stupid dress to my prom.
Fast forward going to college, it was fairly easy putting back on those 8lbs. Pulling all-nighters, eating more junk food, and partying with my sorority sisters and fraternity friends was the perfect recipe for weight gain. At the time, I honestly didn't mind the extra weight. I was having a blast living up the “college life” I’d seen portrayed in movies. I probably genuinely believed I'd just counter the party lifestyle by visiting the campus rec a few times a week and all would be good. It was not all good. And yes, the freshman 15 was very strong closing out that first year of higher education.
When my sophomore year rolled around and that’s when shit really hit the fan. I was denied my financial aid for school, totaled my car (totally not my fault by the way), and had to move back in with my parents. Being financially handicapped there was no way out of this. To get a new car I’d need a job to make some money, without a car I couldn’t get a job, and without money for school, I wasn’t furthering my future. It felt like I had no control over anything - No job. No car. No school… What the hell was I supposed to do?
The start of some of the darkest times of my life would follow all these unfortunate events. I became engulfed in a sea of depression and hopelessness. My life had no purpose... From my severe depression, I developed disordered eating (anorexia and bulimia) in my desperate attempt to control something in my life. I’d spend hours a day looking at pictures of stick-thin girls on my “thinspo” Tumblr account and running/ walking on the treadmill with what little energy my body had left. I was consumed by my dark, negative thoughts, and my distorted body image. I was trapped in my own house and in my own mind.
Looking back now, getting down to 108lbs was terrifying. After four years of battling my eating disorder, by grace from the universe, my loving family, and support system, I was able to get help. With my new-found knowledge, I began extensively researching the proper way to get in shape, and the right foods to eat for nourishment and optimal health. That’s when I created a new Tumblr blog - one with healthy images of women. Women with muscle, women training hard, and eating right. Healthy, happy, and strong women. I began writing and documenting my new found positive thoughts, pictures of my workouts, recovery progress, and nutritious meals. I was on my way to recovery, and I wanted to share with the world my awakening.
From overcoming these tremendous trials, I created this blog (and later my Instagram account) in hopes of it being a positive, inspirational space for anyone who may be battling or has battled depression or an eating disorder, and for everyone who seeks to live a healthier lifestyle.
It is my mission to inspire all humans to be courageous and overcome their own struggles in order to live a holistic and fulfilling life.
